Back to December
by pandaloong1097
Summary: Oneshot: "Something stirred inside of me and it wasn't pleasant."..."I am so stupid! She gave me everything and I just broke up with her for someone I don't even love…"..."'I promise, if you take me back, I'll never make the same mistake again.'"


**Hey. :)**

**So I love Taylor Swift's song "Back to December". I think it's a great song for KC and Clare. I couldn't follow the lyrics exactly, sorry! So…**

**Enjoy and Please Review!**

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing!**_

**KC's POV**

…

_I'm so glad you made time to see me.  
How's life, tell me how's your family?  
I haven't seen them in a while.  
You've been good, busier then ever.  
We small talk, work and the weather  
Your guard is up and I know why.  
Cause the last time you saw me  
Is still burned in the back of your mind.  
You gave me roses and I left them there to die._

…

"Clare."

She stopped walking and glanced at me, and began to walk towards to me.

"Hi, KC" Clare said.

I struggled to say the words that I wanted to say, I couldn't so I just said, "How's...life? Family?"

"Life's good and my family is…" She turned away.

"What's wro-"

A boy dressed in a black was walking towards Clare, _Clare._

Confused, I tossed aside my old question, "Who's that?"

Clare's face immediately lit up, "That's Eli." She said with a wide grin.

Finally reaching her, _Eli _pulled her in and kissed her on the cheek, making her face visibly blush pink.

Something stirred inside of me and it wasn't pleasant.

I was about make a rude remark at _Eli_ but an over-enthusiastic voice called out "KC!"

Reluctantly I turned around, only to be tackled by Jenna.

"Hi." I said in monotone.

Ignoring Jenna's instant chatter, I looked back, and didn't see Clare and Eli.

Jenna grabbed my face and pulled me in for a kiss. I half-heartedly kissed her back.

_Clare…_

…

_These days I haven't been sleeping  
Staying up playing back myself leaving,  
When your birthday passed and I didn't call.  
And I think about summer, all the beautiful times  
I watched you laughing from the passenger side  
Realized that I loved you in the fall.  
Then the cold came, the dark days  
when fear crept into my mind.  
You gave me all your love  
and all I gave you was goodbye._

…

I stared at the clock.

_6:10 A.M._

Sighing, I rolled out of bed, and picked out my clothes.

An uncomfortable lump began in form at the back of my throat, when I realized that I had picked up the same clothes I wore when I broke up with Clare.

Looking at the calendar, I realized today was Clare's birthday.

_Should I call?_

I grabbed my phone and scrolled down to Clare's number. I stared longingly at it.

_No…_

I ran my fingers through my hair.

_I am stupid! She gave me everything and I just broke up with her for someone I don't even love…_

…

_I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile  
So good to me, so right  
And how you held me in your arms  
That September night_

The first time you saw me cry  
Maybe this is wishful thinking  
Probably mindless dreaming  
If we loved again I swear I'd love you right

I'd go back in time and change it but I can't  
So if the chain is on your door, I understand

…

"Thanks mom." I said before closing the car door.

"Wait!" she called out, "So you and Clare are doing a project together?"

I nodded and walked towards Clare's house.

_Don't worry KC, you've went over this 10 times already. She's gonna take you back._

Confident, I knocked three times on Clare's door.

The sight of her surprised me. Her hair was disheveled, face flushed, lips swollen, and her camisole was hanging haphazardly off her shoulder.

"We gotta talk." I said through clenched teeth.

Her face turned crimson. "S-sorry Kc, now's not a, um, good time."

Ignoring her I continued to say, "I miss you, Clare."

She tilted her head to the side to express her confusion. "We see each other at schoo-"

"No, not like that. I-I miss huggin you, holding you, _kissing you_. I promise, if you take me back, I'll never make the same mistake again. And…if you choose not to, I understand."

"KC,"

"Please."

"Did you even break up with Jenna?"

"Forget about her. Please, Clare." I begged.

She bit her lip. "I-I'm sorry KC. We're just not meant to b-"

"What's going on here?" a voice said.

I hadn't realized that I was looking down until I raised my head, only to see _Eli_.

Clare quickly turned to him. "Nothing! Me and KC were just talking." 

I could see him clench his jaw, and I tried not to smirk.

"Well, _KC_," he said in a rude voice, "Clare and I are busy, so how about you talk to her at school tomorrow?"

I lifted my fist to punch him, but he already shut to door, and I punched the door, instead.

I could feel a dent form.

Frustrated I ran. I don't' know where, but just anywhere away from Clare and Eli.

…

_But this is me swallowing my pride  
Standing in front of you  
Saying sorry for that night  
And I go back to December all the time_

It turns out freedom mean nothing but missing you  
Wishing that I realized what I had when you were mine  
I go back to December, turn around and change my own mind  
I go back to December all the time

…

She was leaning against to lockers with her lips pressed against his.

Grudgingly, I walked to them and cleared my throat.

They took their sweet time unclamping their mouths from each other, and when they did, Eli shot me a look that could kill.

"When I said you could talk to her tomorrow, I didn't mean now." He seethed.

I ignored him and looked at Clare. "Clare, I'm moving to the states."

Her eyes widened a bit, but she said nothing.

"Before I go, I just wanted to say, I'm sorry for breaking up with you to be with Jenna. I was being an ass. She wasn't worth it. You are so much better, and I regret what I did. I'll never forget that December when we first kissed, and if I could go back in time and change my mind, I would. I'm-just…sorry, please forgive me."

She just stared at me.

"Clare," I began, but she cut me off.

She smiled at me and said "I forgive you KC."

I smiled, hugged her, nodded at Eli, and walked out of the doors of Degrassi.

_I really do wish I could go back to December…_

...

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